


A Title Doesn't Begin to Describe You

by fallaway



Category: 5 Seconds of Summer (Band)
Genre: Chubby, Comfort, Cute, F/M, Fat - Freeform, Fluff, insecure, vauge
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-01-06
Updated: 2016-01-06
Packaged: 2018-05-12 03:37:46
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,372
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5651131
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/fallaway/pseuds/fallaway
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Calum realizes his girlfriend is insecure and wishes for anything other.</p>
            </blockquote>





	A Title Doesn't Begin to Describe You

Calum always assumed his girl friend was confident. She always lit up the room with her smile and laugh, her wit that flew over most heads but was the shinning star in the right crowd. It was hard not to stare at her. Her hair brushed the top of her bum when she walked, no stride across a room. Her hips opened perfectly against her waist, and her boobs, and her face, and shit Calum fully and whole-heatedly believed she was perfect. Maybe people would disagree, but he really couldn't give a shit. 

Her body was his work of art, his own Mona Lisa. Her personality, stellar. She was just really fucking beautiful. 

But lately, Calum knew something was different. Maybe it was the way she dressed herself? She seemed squeamish when Cal touched her and he didn't quite understand but she would stare at him when he was shirtless, but not with lust but something more like longing? And yeah, Calum was a little insecure himself. 

Calum had always been a lanky kid no matter what he tried. He had played soccer since he could remember and the weight training and outer gym sessions did nothing. He even tried an all red meat diet once, not even a pound. Being over six feet tall and barley hitting 140, he felt a little more than goofy most the time. When he could barley walk down the hall without tripping over himself his face would redden or when he couldn't move the couch for his mom and he felt like laying under it and letting the couch crush him instead. 

But when he met her all this seemed to be even more prevalent, but since the beginning she always tried to make sure he never felt that way. She always told him how beautiful it was to be able to run her hands over his ribs or the notches in his spine speaking metaphors about bodies and the skeletons. And the days her raspy voice couldn't ease these thoughts, she knew to just let him lay in her lap and watch dumb movies that he knew she didn't really enjoy but he knew she would endure more than a movie to make him feel better. She would whisper in his ear all the other reason she loved him, like his sense of humor, or the way he shared her passion of reading, or why the music they liked was so much better than the main stream music they could find, or even if he did bruise easily he never minded going into a pit at shows. There shared love of dogs was always a go to when even School of Rock couldn't mute the insecurities. 

Watching her now standing in front of a mirror, frowning, was foreign territory and Calum felt it too. He felt all the times he looked into the mirror the same way and it was really fucking painful to think of this girl he loved ever feeling that. He told her all the time how beautiful she was and how 'weight can't define a person', something she has repeated to him so many times. But now he was wondering if that was enough? 

But of course, he didn't say anything. Just wrapped his hands around her waist smiling at her through the mirror in a silent greeting and also a silent wish that he wasn't so awkward or his hands could take all the pain and dark thoughts and insecurities away. 

The next time he noticed this insecurity, was when he let himself in silently after soccer, knowing she was home alone and not wanting to scare her. He turned the corner to the kitchen opening his mouth for a greeting before he saw what was really going on. 

She sat in front of a small plate of food, but instead of a fork she held her hips, then pressed on her lower torso almost as if she was trying to make herself smaller, and fuck, Calum wished she knew how perfect she was, wished he knew what she was thinking was ridiculous and what she wanted was wild. 

Calum watched her push the small plate further away from herself and herself further into the back of the chair and Calum swore it looked like she was trying to disappear. And wow, okay, this was too much now, "Hi," Calum pulled himself together, "Whatcha eating?" 

"Nothing," she smiled back at him and, dear lord she was good at putting on this mask Calum wondered what else he couldn't see. 

Calum hopped up on the counter before dropping the plate into his lap, "Who's this for?" 

She shrugged, not looking at Calum tearing him apart. 

He picked up the smallest apple piece and swiped it through the peanut butter before dropping it in his mouth, "S'good," he muttered through the sticky food, "Sure you don't want any?" 

She scrunched up her nose and shook her head, "Nah, you got it." 

Calum clicked his tongue and dropped a bigger piece in the spread, "But I made this one specifically for you." 

She giggled this time and Calum really didn't understand how someone could be so strong, "I just ate." 

"I swear if you don't eat this," Calum began making sure to wear his crooked smile he knew she adored for some reason, "I will smear the peanut butter all over your face." 

"You wouldn't," she said in false freight. 

He nodded slowly, raising his eyebrow he gave her one more moment to open her mouth before slashing her cheek with peanut butter. 

"Stop!" she laughed out, then opening her mouth so Calum could place the end with the remaining peanut butter in her mouth. 

He feed her the remaining apples slowly, even making her lick the peanut butter from her face off his finger. All the while, telling her how cute she was, or how lovely her laugh was even muffled through peanut butter, and how she's so extremely intelligent and everything else she deserves to hear. 

The final time he saw these thoughts pulled into actions he knew this was enough and it had gone to far and it was probley his fault. This was ridiculous and frustrating and she had no reason to act like this because she was a fucking stunner and all the other lyrics Milky Chance was singing in the back ground. 

She was straddled across his lower abdomen, Calum obviously laying beneath her. Nothing sexual, just a few tickles as they discussed "The Sun Also Rises" for the who-knows-how-many-number of times, but it was her favorite and he actually was quite enjoying her newest theory. 

He laid underneath her with his shirt unbuttoned but she was fully dressed. And he thought this was it's own little tragedy of some sort. He had this beautiful girl on top of him, speaking so passionately and yeah it kinda took his breath away the way she almost seemed to glow, but her naked body not even DiVinci could of drawn to it's fullest. 

He began drifting his hand up thigh slowly, her body going stiff but her speech of the importance of the placement of the introductions of the characters never faltering. He tickled her hips under her shirt before she elbowed them away, not daring to comment on the slight frown on his face.

But how her speech stopped and her hands roamed over the tight skin over his chest instead, then painting her fingers over his ribs which seemed to protrude more than ever as her small fingers ran through the dips like water flowing through a canyon and when he hands cupped his hipbones he recognized that look. 

"Come here," he said gently, pulling her wrist up to his shoulders so she was pressed against him. 

She whined and squirmed before settling on him, "Am I crushing you?" she laughed out softly like she had so many times before, but now it wasn't cute or endearing because maybe he should of known sooner that it meant a little more than she let on. 

"What's going on?" Calum asked her, running his finger over he hair that always smelt a little like flowers and something so distinctive her. 

"Nothing," she mumbled against his chest.

"Princess," he sighed, and no he really didn't want to do this. Not that he didn't love telling her how fucking perfect she was and seeing how her cheeks highlight a little bit and her eyes smile under her lashes, but he wished that he didn't have to do so because of the circumstance of shitty and ridiculous accusations of her thoughts. 

"I see the way you look at yourself in the mirror and I saw you that day with the apples, and it worries me." 

Calum felt the way her face heated up against his chest and he felt like shit because he knew he was embarrassing her but that's not the purpose. 

"Does it ever bother you that my thighs are bigger than yours?" she asked softly, "Or that I almost weigh as much as you?" 

Calum let out a small breathe because, wow he was kind of the problem. He knew she didn't mean it that way, but damn he really was the one casting her that pain. Calum pushed himself up against the head board bringing her with him, "You never cared before? What brought this up?" 

"Do you remember when my sister and her boyfriend came over for my dad's birthday?" Calum nodded, "Well, after you left they started asking me questions about us and like having sex and things, and if it was awkward or if we ever got stared at in the streets or if it was weird, me being the bigger one? And then I started thinking and it was true. I always feel like I'm going to crush you or that I'm knocking you over and we do get looked when we go out. And one time my friend asked me if I ever let you eat and I didn't get it at the time, but now I do."

Fucking hell, Calum felt so bad any of this, "I'm sorry." 

"What?" she said incredulously, "This isn't your fault. I love your body, you know that. I'm the one who's fat and bring people to question why your with me. I'm the one who's sorry." 

And now Calum really fucking hated himself. How could he be so daft and selfish? "No, Princess," he had no idea what to say or how to say it, btu God who fucking cared what others thought? "You're so much more than that." 

She frowned, "But does it bother you?" 

"No," Oliver said surely of himself, nothing about her bothered him, not even when she has fits in her sleep and sends him off the bed or when she yells at the TV during shows or debates and he can't hear a word of what they're saying, he finds all of her so fucking perfect it was just mental for her to think otherwise. 

"First of all, it's the other way around, I eat all of your food and anyone who has a problem with that can just ask your mum," she giggles jut enough for Calum to gain more courage to continue with his impromptu speech, "Secondly, I love when you get frisky and you knock me over when we are messing around because it lets me know I'm not the only one who enjoys it," her face blushed but a smile also appears. 

"And finally, no, you aren't 'chubby' or 'fat' or whatever else you want to call yourself. You're important and gorgeous and intelligent, you're everything I'm not. And because of that we fit so well together. Your sexy curves fill in my insecurities and make me stronger than I ever thought I could be. Just feel the way our bodies lie together now. The spot in between my ribs that fucking conclaves and I fucking hate, your boobs cover so when I look down I get turned on instead of sad. And my hipbones and the way they poke out over my belt awkwardly seem invisible because your butt poking up is all I can see. And your thighs are so fucking full and powerful and I am so jealous because they make yoru jeans fit you so nicely while mine, no matter what, are always baggy." 

She pressed her mouth against his chest before beginning quietly, "Cal-"

And Calum interrupts her because he needs to finish this before he loses confidence, "Wait, I'm not done because I skipped my favorite part. I love that you have weight on your hips because I don't have to experience your hip bones poking me like you always tell me when I lay on top of you. And I really fucking love your tummy, you know that? I love your tummy that you have been trying to hide so desperately recently. But I don't know why, because it's so soft and it gives me something to press into as I'm going down on you," he says and she immediately drops her face into his chest again, "And there'd be nothing to cuddle with when I'm sleepy or sad, and it gives me more of you to love and hug and wrap my unbelievably long arms around."

"Stop," she breathes against his chest. 

"But wait," he continues like he has a novel already written because at this point he probley does, "And even if you did 'crush' me when you laid on me I wouldn't mind because I love your laugh, and your personality, and your jokes, and your kindness, and how fucking smart you are above all. It's just a bonus your attractive." 

"i love you too," she whispered back, but Calum notices a tears in her eyes first.

"You're incredible and I will keep telling you until you believe me and far after that, alright?" 

"Alright," she nodded and shuffled up to kiss him gently. 

And that might of not been the last time he saw this insecurity. But at least he knew for sure that she knew exactly how Calum felt about every inch of her.


End file.
